TERRY PRATCHETT,
英國暢銷小說家,
影片開頭自陳:
I write fantasy novels for a living. (我寫奇幻小說為生)
59 歲時, 被診斷患有阿茲海默症,
影片拍攝時為 62 歲,
當時的他, 早已無法打字,
寫作需倚靠助理,
將自己口述的小說內容打成文字.
他在影片中提到:
When I can no longer write my books, I'm not sure that I will want to go on living. (當我不能再寫書時, 我不確定我是否還想繼續生活下去.)
But I don't quite know how, and I'm not quite sure when. (但我不太知道如何做, 也不太確定是何時)
於是,
他走訪和 ” assisted dying ” ( 協助死亡 ) 相關的人. 事. 物,
面對自己的生命課題.
VEERLA CLAUS-DE WIT,
一位比利時作家 Hugo Claus之遺孀.
Hugo Claus 因罹患阿茲海默症,
選擇 ” assisted death ” 結束自己的生命.
他生前曾說:
If I have Alzheimer's, I will not go on living till the bitter end. I will put an end to myself.
於是, 在太太的陪伴下,
他們一同到醫院進行.
他太太憶及:
I laid myself next to him and I held him. And I sung a song for him, and he started singing with me and he died singing. (他在歌唱中死去)
她也提到:
It makes me sad, but, in a way, I was glad for my husband. (丈夫的離開讓她感到難過, 但某種程度而言, 她為丈夫感到欣慰)
MICK GORDELIER,
罹患運動神經元疾病 ( motor neurone disease ) ,
俗稱漸凍症.
本身認同 ” assisted dying ” ( 協助死亡 ) ,
曾與瑞士連繫,
( 外國人可合法進行 ” assisted dying ” ( 協助死亡 ) 的國家 )
但, 後來選擇進入安寧照顧.
他談到:
II'm lucky, cos I had the hospice to fall on. That's been my saviour. The hospice came to my rescue. (對他而言, 安寧照顧拯救了他, 他視為依靠.)
ANDREW COLGAN,
34 歲時. 被診斷出罹患多發性硬化症 ( multiple sclerosis ),
一種無法治癒的疾病.
多數早晨, 他是以 ” 跌落床 “ 的方式起床,
他感到自己的狀況會愈來愈糟.
他形容:
It's like walking down an alley, that's getting narrower with no doors. It's sort of less place to move around.
他說:
I can't, and I don't want to live the life I've got now. (我無法，也不想過我現在這樣的生活)
他曾試著服下大量嗎啡, 以結束自己的生命,
而, 結果是, 他昏迷了 5天.
他希望:
I would like to have a death which is comfortable, relatively painless.
於是,
他前往瑞士, 結束自己的生命.
慶幸地, 他的家人陪伴著他, 這是他沒想過的.
他的母親談到,
我們在這裡是要支持他.
她說:
You know, anything in desperation to keep him. But it's selfish. Tis a selfish and not a loving thing to do. (為了留住他, 不惜一切. 但這是自私, 不是愛.)
we can't bear to think of him lying in a bed, in some of the conditions, we know he could possibly end up in. It took me a long, long while to realise that the quality of life that he has now is not acceptable. (我花很長的時間才了解到, 他目前的生活品質是不可接受的.)
Andrew 離開的前一晚,
Terry Pratchett 與他碰面, 並和他說再見.
Andrew 給了 Terry 一份自己最愛的音樂專輯清單,
隔日, 他將播放其中一個,
伴隨 42 歲的他離世…….
PETER SMEDLEY,
罹患運動神經元疾病 ( motor neurone disease ) , 沒有治療的方法.
他形容疾病:
This is not an affliction that one wants to see through to the end. It's a beastly, undignified business....... (對他而言, 疾病如同野獸般. 沒有尊嚴的苦難.)
他說:
I look on Dignitas as a way out, really, to assist me, to be free of this affliction. (他視 "Dignitas" (瑞士合法進行"assisted dying"(協助死亡) 機構)為幫助自己脫離苦難的出路)
於是,
他前往瑞士, 結束自己的生命.
且同意 Terry Pratchett 過程在場並拍攝影片.
他的太太, 曾在加護病房陪伴她的母親 11 個星期,
過程中, 她的母親不斷地看著她, 並做出 ” 殺了我 ” 的手勢,
這對她有很深的影響.
她支持先生, 她說:
I wouldn't put my dog or my cat through an unpleasant, undignified ending. And I don't want that locked-in feeling for him. So I'm quite supportive, really.
她也談到:
I obviously don't want him to go. Peter's been my other half for 40 years. I feel that it's going to be tough on me. But I think it's going to be a great relief for you. (為了先生著想, 再難, 還是陪伴他走到最後)
最後,
Peter Smedley 的太太輕撫著他的手…….
他離世.
影片最後,
Terry Pratchett 談到:
I was in the presence of the bravest man I'd ever met. I'm not certain I could do that. I'm not certain that my hand wouldn't shake. But then I'm not certain what I would really do if I was really there.
I want to stay around as long as I can, to see assisted dying done properly in the UK. (他決定繼續活著, 在英國推動 "assisted dying". )
2015 , Terry Pratchett 在家中離世, 家人在旁, 得年 66 歲. ( BBC NEWS )
第一次觀看這部影片, 是 2013 在公視主題之夜, 當時中譯片名為 ” 死亡處方箋 “ .
之後, 想再看這部影片, 已難找到附有中文或英文字幕版本.
只能在網路上, 找到這部影片的英文字幕,
搭著 Dailymotion 上的影片,
慢慢看…….